Toward a Humanistic Psychology of Childhood: The Forgotten Child in Humanistic Psychology

Humanistic and existential psychology are undoubtedly among the most modern and progressive approaches to understanding and explaining human beings. Yet, despite their many contributions, they have not developed a comprehensive theory of childhood. This may represent one of the most significant historical gaps within the humanistic movement.

Since its emergence in the mid-twentieth century, humanistic psychology has sought to offer a different image of the human person. At a time when behaviorism emphasized observable behavior and psychoanalysis focused on unconscious forces, humanistic psychology turned its attention toward lived experience, freedom, choice, meaning, creativity and the human capacity for growth. For this reason, it has often been described as the “third force” in psychology.

More than perhaps any other psychological tradition, humanistic psychology has spoken about what it means to be human. Freedom, choice, meaning, creativity, growth, authenticity, and human dignity have been among its central concerns. Yet one fundamental question remains largely unanswered: Where is the child in all of this?

When we read the foundational works of humanistic psychology, we encounter a person who seems to have been an adult from the very beginning. This is a person who chooses, creates meaning, assumes responsibility, reflects on relationships, and strives for self-actualization.

But where did this person come from? At one time, this person was a child. A child who experienced love for the first time, feared something, felt lonely, was humiliated, was accepted, played and struggled to discover the world. Yet childhood occupies only a marginal—and sometimes almost invisible—place within much of the literature of humanistic psychology. Of course, it is not the task of humanistic psychology to provide developmental stages of childhood or classifications of cognitive abilities. Other branches of psychology have taken responsibility for these areas. However, if humanistic and existential psychology claim to understand human experience, how can they overlook the very period in which that experience first begins to take shape? In many humanistic texts, the standard human being appears to be a healthy, autonomous adult person who has already achieved the capacity for choice, meaning-making and self-reflection. This person often appears without a childhood history—without early experiences of acceptance, rejection, shame, fear, belonging or exclusion.

This observation is not, in itself, a criticism of the field. Many humanistic theories developed in response to questions about adult life and adult suffering. Nevertheless, an unintended consequence has been that childhood has received relatively limited attention as an essential dimension of human existence. As a result, in significant parts of humanistic literature, the human being appears without a childhood history. The reader encounters a person who searches for meaning, makes choices, assumes responsibility, and seeks growth, yet rarely encounters the question of how the roots of these capacities were formed during the earliest years of life.

Is the Child a Person?

One of the foundational concepts in humanistic psychology is the concept of the person. Carl Rogers described psychotherapy as a process of becoming a person and understood psychological growth as movement toward greater authenticity, congruence, and openness to experience.

Yet this concept raises a fundamental question: Is a child becoming a person, or is a child already a person from the very beginning?

Much education and many approaches to child development have been built upon the assumption that children are incomplete beings who must be prepared for the future. Within this framework, the value of many childhood activities is often measured by the outcomes they will eventually produce in adulthood. Childhood becomes a period of preparation rather than a meaningful stage of life in itself. However, the central values of humanistic psychology invite us to consider another possibility.

Rogers argued that every individual possesses an inherent tendency toward growth and fulfillment. This actualizing tendency does not suddenly appear in adulthood; it exists from the beginning of life. If this is true, then the child cannot be understood merely as a future person. The child is already a person whose experiences, emotions, perceptions and relationships deserve respect in the present.

A similar conclusion emerges from the work of Abraham Maslow. Although Maslow is best known for his theory of self-actualization, he consistently emphasized the inherent worth and dignity of every human being. Human growth is not the process of becoming human; rather, it is the unfolding of potentials that already exist within the person. From this perspective, childhood is not simply a pathway toward humanity. It is one of the earliest and most important expressions of humanity itself.

Rollo May’s existential perspective offers another important insight. May viewed human beings as active participants in creating their lives, struggling with freedom, anxiety, meaning, and relationships. Although these concerns are often discussed in relation to adults, children also encounter the world as beings who create meaning. Children experience love, fear, loneliness, wonder, acceptance, rejection, courage and vulnerability. Their existential world may differ from that of adults, but it is no less real. To overlook the child’s lived experience is to overlook a significant dimension of human existence.

If human dignity is inherent, then children must possess the same dignity that we attribute to adults. If human experience has value, then children’s experiences must also be valued. If authenticity matters, then the authenticity of children deserves our attention and respect.

From this perspective, childhood is not merely a stage on the way to becoming human. Childhood is itself a way of being human. Perhaps one of the unfinished tasks of humanistic and existential psychology is to develop a richer understanding of childhood—not as a preliminary phase before personhood begins, but as a unique and meaningful form of personhood in its own right. Such a perspective would extend the humanistic commitment to dignity, authenticity, freedom and growth to those whose voices have too often remained at the margins of psychological theory: children.

The Child: A Human Being, Not a Project for the Future

Because the foundations of humanistic psychology have not sufficiently focused on childhood, educational systems have not been able to fully benefit from this philosophical and psychological perspective. Most educational models and practices have been shaped either by behavioral theories or by cognitive approaches. Although humanistic ideas have the potential to transform education from early childhood to higher education, teachers and educators have rarely been provided with clear and practical frameworks for applying these principles in their work with children and students. This represents a significant loss because many central ideas of humanistic psychology have the potential to make educational systems more compassionate, modern and responsive to human development.

For example, the idea of holistic development—the understanding that human growth involves the integration of emotional, social, intellectual, creative, and relational dimensions—has become an important foundation of progressive educational approaches. Later, this idea influenced educational models such as the Reggio Emilia approach, which views children as whole human beings with multiple ways of expressing themselves and understanding the world.

Similarly, many international educational frameworks have attempted to incorporate ideas of holistic and integrated human development, concepts deeply connected to humanistic psychology, into broader educational goals. However, many educational systems continue to be influenced primarily by behaviorist and cognitive perspectives. As a result, education often becomes controlling, one-directional and limited in its understanding of children. In some cases, these systems may unintentionally create environments that ignore children’s present experiences while focusing only on future outcomes. These systems often insist that children should study in order to succeed in the future. They should acquire skills in order to have a better life later. They should receive education in order to become productive and useful citizens.

Yet behind these assumptions lies a deeper problem: many educational systems define the desired outcome in advance and then attempt to shape children through predetermined expectations and forms of conditioning.

Education becomes organized around achieving external goals rather than responding to children’s individual needs, capacities, interests, and unique ways of experiencing the world. However, another danger emerges from the absence of a stronger humanistic perspective in education: the possibility that the child’s actual life may be forgotten. The child is constantly prepared for tomorrow, for future achievements, future responsibilities, and the expectations of others, while having fewer opportunities to truly experience today. Humanistic psychology has always emphasized the importance of living in the present moment. Yet this principle has rarely been fully applied to childhood.

Children need opportunities to experience life directly. They need opportunities to play, imagine, explore, build friendships, make mistakes, ask questions and discover who they are.

These activities are not merely preparation for the future. They are life itself. Childhood is not a waiting period before real life begins. Childhood is part of life.

Therapy Without Repairing the Child

One important contribution expected from humanistic psychology is its potential to offer a different direction for child mental health and therapeutic systems. A significant portion of current child mental health services is built around identifying problems and correcting them. Within these approaches, children are often understood primarily as individuals who have a disorder, a symptom or a problematic behavior. The anxious child, the aggressive child, the inattentive child or the withdrawn child becomes a child who needs to be changed. The assumption is that the child’s behaviors must be corrected and that the child must be guided back toward an expected path. As a result, many therapeutic approaches for children have become strongly focused on behavior modification, often without sufficiently exploring why these behaviors emerged or what meaning they may have within the child’s lived experience.

When treatment focuses only on eliminating visible behaviors without understanding the roots and conditions that shaped them, there is a risk that symptoms may decrease while deeper struggles remain unresolved. This is one reason why many families have become exhausted by behavioral and cognitive approaches. Some of these methods can be useful, especially in certain situations and in the short term. However, many parents feel that their child is not truly being seen; instead, the child is only being managed. Even therapeutic approaches such as play therapy, art therapy or analytical approaches—although valuable and meaningful—do not always fully respond to the deeper and longer-term needs of children and families. In some cases, therapeutic processes may continue for years without creating a significant transformation in the child’s overall quality of life.

A humanistic approach can offer a different path. From this perspective, therapy does not begin with the question: “how can we change this child?” Instead, it begins with a different question: “what is this child experiencing?”

This shift represents a fundamental change in the understanding of the child. A humanistic approach does not view the child as a problem that exists separately from the world around them. The child is not simply the location where a problem appears; the child is a human being shaped through relationships, culture, family experiences, social conditions and historical circumstances. From this perspective, a child’s emotional and behavioral difficulties cannot be understood without considering the larger context in which the child lives. The child is influenced by the quality of relationships, parenting patterns, cultural expectations, educational environments, social pressures and even economic realities. Therefore, humanistic therapy does not focus only on the child as the identified problem. Instead, it invites the entire system around the child to participate in understanding and responding to the difficulty. The family becomes an active part of the healing process, not as a source of blame, but as a source of awareness, support and growth. Parents are empowered to understand their child’s emotional world, recognize unmet needs and create more supportive relationships. This approach asks deeper questions: What has this child experienced? What relationships have shaped the child’s understanding of safety, love, and belonging? What messages has the child received from family, school, and society? What needs or emotions may be expressed through the child’s behavior?

The purpose is not simply to remove a behavior, but to understand the meaning behind it. One of the central contributions of humanistic psychology is its attention to lived experience. This approach emphasizes that human beings do not experience the world simply as it objectively exists; rather, they understand and respond to the world as they perceive and experience it. A child’s behavior is often a form of communication. What appears as defiance, aggression, withdrawal or anxiety may represent an attempt to express something that the child does not yet have the words to communicate. Therefore, the therapeutic process becomes an exploration of the child’s inner world rather than a process of repairing a defective child. When the child is understood within the fullness of their human experience, therapy has the potential to create deeper and more lasting change. It does not only reduce symptoms; it supports growth, strengthens relationships and helps the child and family discover new possibilities. In this sense, humanistic therapy is not therapy for fixing children. It is therapy for meeting children, understanding them and creating the conditions in which they can grow.

Understanding the Child’s Inner World

One of the major contributions of humanistic psychology is its attention to lived experience. This approach emphasizes that human beings do not experience the world simply as it objectively exists; rather, they understand and respond to the world through their own perceptions, meanings, and personal experiences.

Therefore, phenomenological questions become essential when attempting to understand and support children: How does the child experience the presence of other people? How does each relationship shape the emotional world of the child? How do parental roles and attachment experiences develop within the child’s personal reality? How does the child experience belonging? What does fear mean for a child? How does fear emerge, and how does it become persistent? How do friendship, shame, rejection, or acceptance take shape within the child’s inner world?

These questions move beyond focusing only on children’s observable behaviors. They direct our attention toward the child’s subjective experience—the inner world of emotions, meanings, relationships, and personal interpretations.This is precisely an area where humanistic psychology can make an important contribution to the future development of child mental health.Rather than viewing children primarily through the lens of symptoms, diagnoses, or problems, a humanistic perspective invites professionals to encounter the child as a whole person.The child is not simply a collection of behaviors.The child is a person with a history, a voice, a unique perception of the world, and a capacity for growth.

From Managing Children to Meeting Children

Many common approaches in the field of childhood are centered around management. Managing behavior, managing emotions, managing crises, and even managing relationships and feelings. Within many educational and therapeutic systems, children are often viewed as problems that need to be controlled, regulated or corrected. However, the humanistic approach offers a different possibility: Instead of managing the child, we can meet the child.

To meet a child means to listen to and understand the world in which that child lives—a world that is unique to each individual child. It requires an effort to see experiences, struggles, relationships and emotions from the child’s perspective and to support the child through deeper understanding and connection. Because when a child is truly understood, many difficulties that are labeled as disorders may reveal a different meaning. A child’s behavior may no longer simply be seen as a problem to eliminate, but as a form of communication—a way through which the child expresses needs, fears, experiences or unmet emotional realities.

At the same time, perhaps one of the most important gifts humanistic psychology can offer children is presence.

Real presence. Not presence for judging. Not presence for correcting. But presence for understanding. Children need to be seen more than they need to be analyzed. They need to be heard more than they need to be advised.

Empathy, acceptance, and authenticity, the qualities that Carl Rogers described as essential conditions for psychological growth, can become the foundations of a new approach to working with children. From another perspective, Abraham Maslow’s theory of human needs can also open new possibilities for understanding childhood. Needs are not signs of weakness. Needs are a natural part of being human. Ignoring fundamental human needs can create suffering and psychological difficulties, while recognizing and responding to those needs creates conditions for growth and development. Therefore, supporting children does not begin by asking how to make them fit into our expectations. It begins by asking: How can we understand them? How can we respect their experiences? How can we create the conditions in which they can become who they are?

Conclusion

Humanistic psychology has made one of the most important contributions to psychology by restoring attention to the human being as a person with dignity, freedom, meaning, and the capacity for growth. However, one unfinished task remains: developing a deeper and more comprehensive understanding of childhood. If humanistic psychology seeks to understand human existence, it must also listen to the earliest experiences through which human existence begins.

The child should not be understood merely as an adult in preparation. The child is not a project for the future. The child is a person in the present.

A humanistic understanding of childhood requires a shift from controlling children to understanding them, from correcting them to connecting with them, and from seeing their difficulties only as problems to recognizing them as expressions of lived experience. Education and mental health systems can become more humane when they recognize that children are not simply individuals who must be shaped according to external expectations. They are human beings whose voices, emotions, relationships, and experiences deserve recognition. Perhaps the future of humanistic psychology depends partly on its ability to return to a question that has remained insufficiently explored: who is the child?

And perhaps the answer begins with a simple recognition: the child is already a person.