Top 10 Benefits of the Coming Global Apocalypse’s managing editor Peter Bjork crawls out of editorial obscurity to bring you a most-definitely serious list of benefits of the coming apocalypse on this, the first of April, 2016.

10. No more Adobe product updates
9. Now-rare Skittles® candy used as currency
8. Congressional dysfunction officially a thing of the past
7. I won’t have to learn how to use Snapchat
6. A 24-hour cable news-free world
5. Bible production halted
4. College debt relief!
3. Peggy Noonan columns now easily avoidable
2. We’ll finally laugh at how silly the Gif/Jif pronunciation debate was
1. Big Bang Theory cancelled


And now, back to your regularly-scheduled material.
Happy April Fools’ Day!