Kirk Cameron: Back to Atheism Thanks to Bruised Banana

PHoto by Gred Skidmore via Flickr PHoto by Gred Skidmore via Flickr

Kirk Cameron, co-host of the evangelical television show The Way of the Master, has publically declared himself a nonbeliever—again. Cameron identified as an atheist until the age of 17, when he became born again at the height of his career on the hit TV show Growing Pains. After the show was cancelled, Cameron starred in Christian films and traveled with fellow evangelical Christian Ray Comfort, debating nonbelievers and training fellow Christians how to evangelize.

Until recently, Cameron had argued that the shape, non-slip surface, biodegradable wrapper, and nutritional value of a banana are proof enough that God exists. In other words, the banana is so perfect that it had to be created by a divine being.

So, why did Cameron revert back to atheism? He was reportedly at Costco last week buying groceries for his family when he stumbled upon a funny looking banana. According to his Twitter feed, Cameron described the banana as “S-shaped, bruised, and unnatural looking.” He was in such shock that he took the piece of fruit and ran out the door (breaking the 8th Commandment : “thou shalt not steal”).

On his way home, Cameron began to question God’s existence because God would never create such an imperfect and ugly banana. Now Mr. Cameron, who declared himself “bruised but not broken,” is wearing his atheist badge with pride. According to The Way of the Master website, they’re looking for a new co-host for their television show.

Learn more.

  • wingramm77

    Gotta love April Fools

  • DC

    How I wish this were real so I could genuinely laugh about his “faith”…

  • http://www.oliviamungal.com/ Olivia Mungal

    Oh you guys. You almost had me going…

  • Sasha

    He should drop dead.

    • Joel

      How very humanist of you.

      • Captain Obvious

        I don’t see anywhere that she claimed to be a humanist.

        • Joel

          True, I made an assumption. I guess we’ll have to wait for a response.

          • lola sins

            You made a greater error…even IF she identified as a humanist, something she said or believed would not a/the humanist ethos make.

            In other words, one does not define another, even if they happen to ascribe to a group.

          • Joel

            I wasn’t arguing about who made the bigger error. Being a humanist and wishing death upon people are antithetical.
            To quote the Humanist Manifesto III:
            “Humanists ground values in human welfare…”
            “We are committed to treating each person as having inherent worth and dignity…”
            “Humanists long for and strive toward a world of mutual care and concern,
            free of cruelty and its consequences, where differences are resolved
            cooperatively without resorting to violence.”
            “Humanists are concerned for the well being of all”

            Please compare that to “He should drop dead” and tell me how one who professes acceptance of one can also profess acceptance of the other.

  • John

    This is why I hate April Fool’s Day. Wading through all of the “Just kidding”s is tedious.

    • LJP

      OK Grumpy! Cheer up.

    • Karen

      It’s easiest to figure that nothing posted today is real and factual.

      • ChoMa

        But if this comment is not is real and factual, then everything is real and factual what makes this comment….

        • Slow Moving Vehicle

          Wait – are you from Crete?

          • Jami Shofner

            Don’t dis Crete!

      • Tom

        So I’m supposed to ignore all the news about Malaysia Airlines Flight 370?

        • FUD

          yes

    • Jodie

      I’m with you John. Our local news paper ran an article that was sounded true (wasn’t obvious satire) and it had a bunch of people very annoyed.

  • velveteenRabbit

    *sigh* there’s already enough “satire” on the net these days…… irritating that I got my hopes up here.

  • Katrina Fluttershy K

    haha nice april fools joke

  • PhyllisO

    We wish.

  • Milton E. Findley

    Is it ok if I know it is April first, and I still don’t care what this guy thinks?

    • Jeff Davidson

      Funny that you took the time to read it and then comment, but also try to say you don’t care…
      Contradiction much?

      • Milton E. Findley

        How would I know I didn’t care until after I examined the exhibit? Jump to conclusions much? ;)

        • Fred Bouwman

          If you didn’t care, why bother commenting?

          • Milton E. Findley

            To demonstrate the utter futility of trying to make sense of your thought processes a month and several days after the article was posted as an April Fools joke? I had to re-read it due to my advanced age in order to see what it was about it has been so long ago. Have mercy, I don’t have this kind of time left to keep wasting. ;)

    • Jennifer Pekrul

      I loved reading it as well, I knew it was fake but it was so funny. Even if this guy did say he’s athiest again, I would never really care….he’s really just another talking head lol

      • Milton E. Findley

        Sort of like a holiness preacher, entertaining but not to be taken seriously.

  • Pinkophile

    Wild banana is inedible and packed with seeds. Man altered grocery store GMO bananas are seedless and sterile.

    • LJP

      This is supposed to be funny. Lighten up Pinky!

      • Pinkophile

        Chill LJP. What’s funny is that the Christian Right are using bananas as a God created perfect fruit, and their followers have no idea that domesticated bananas were modified by men (& women). :p

    • PStryder

      Actually, they are not GMO, unless you consider all ‘bred’ organisms to be GMOs. Bananas were first cultivated in the form we know them 7-10,000 years ago. Not much GMO research being done then.

      • Geoff Offermann

        And that depends on what you consider to be “genetically modified”. ;-)

        The banana was cultivated with artificial selection. Thus it’s genome has been “modified” though not in the sense of the term as it is commonly used.

        • Woof

          Dogs too…

      • ChoMa

        Well, they are GMO in a sense. Breeding is some kind of genetic engineering technique. Isn’t it? In any case, I don’t understand what is SO wrong with the “current” GMO techniques when compared with breeding.

      • Robert H

        You are all wrong… GMO? What does that mean.. More like WWJD! aaaah…just kidding

      • Joseph Trzaska

        They are GMO. But most people refer to GMO when they should be more specific. Transgenic engineering is what most people are scared of and referring to when they say GMO.

      • John H

        Only organisms that have had their genes directly modified by human intervention are considered “GMOs”. While modification of genes DOES take place through reduplication, transcription errors, viral insertion, etc. without human intervention, selective breeding DOES NOT MODIFY ANY GENES. One could argue that it modifies the genetic make-up and diversity of the selected population, but it can only select for genes that have been modified by other, “natural” means. So “GMO” in a context where we’re talking about human activity is an appropriate label that does not include human selection.

      • Mixy

        The scientific definition of GMO encompasses selective breeding by humans so technically everything we eat is GMO. What people generally consider GMO today is simply a more direct and therefore quicker method of genetic modification.

      • Matt Ranson

        Bollocks, that would mean they were cultivated when the earth was created.

        • rwwriley

          Yeah, but that was only six thousand years ago.

    • DJN

      Also, learn what GMO means.

      • spookiewon

        That’s actually the problem. GMO isn’t definitively defined. Everyone and every “opposition group” uses it differently.

        • BioWonk

          The recombinant DNA techniques that are used to produce targeted proteins for medicine and traits in the foods that the pseudointellectual anti-science types so mindlessly oppose is transgenic engineering (TE). The fact that they latched onto the acronym “GMO” when that encompasses any organism that is genetically modified through TE or selective breeding, just demonstrates how little they understand the science they oppose.

    • Rowan Sauer

      Grocery Store bananas are only GMO when you consider selective breeding. The reason they (like seedless grapes) don’t have seeds is because they were planted from banana tree clippings, not from seeds.

    • shapeshifter7

      Actually today’s bananas are the result of cloning technology.

  • Jack Dempsey Wahl

    Oy! April Fools!

  • dprkforum

    I had to look twice to make sure this was not the Onion.

    • carter

      I’m curious what april fools joke the Onion does have for us. maybe they’ll give off real news XD

  • Leigh Dunlap

    Sounds like a load of crap to me. He must have always been completely unhinged if any of this is true.

  • Hank Watson

    Don’t understand humanists! Thought we we’re all humans. Happy April fools all the same,though.

    • lola sins

      Dear Hank,
      Being humorous is human. What is not to understand?
      Try not to overthink it.

      • Karen

        Try not to apply your assumptions to everyone. Your beliefs are not always factual, your idea of humor is not applicable to everyone. In most cases “being humorous” means much the same thing as being an a**.

  • Byron C Mayes

    What day is this?

  • Ryan

    Good one! Bruised Banana, Lmao!

  • Brenda Lunger

    Poor banana experienced Growing Pains?

  • RM666

    wingnut

  • Chan Gardner

    April Fools!!

    • John Oliver Mason

      APRIL Fool? This guy’s a fool all year around. I wouldn’t trust him.

  • John Oliver Mason

    This guy has bruised bananas for brains, bouncing from one belief to another due to looking at a banana. Does Cameron believe in ANY thing?

    • disqusthis50

      Oh my god, you’re stupid.. Look at the calendar you fool.

  • http://www.alexthomasactor.com/ Alexander

    I actually didn’t know that about Cameron. So he’s not just an April fool. He’s a year round fool.

  • pixiejean

    how stupid.

  • liaisonsus

    I could not care less about this guy, who is a raving lunatic and actually proof God does not exist, because a higher intelligence could never create such flawed and crazy human!

  • XaurreauX Pont DeLac

    Kirk Cameron IS a bruised banana.

  • lora120

    Is this a joke? Too funny (in a very sad kind of way).

  • http://yellowdoggrannie.blogspot.com yellowdoggranny

    he’s batshit.

  • Shirl Treiber Lekanoff

    LOL! I wish!

  • Rick Runyon

    Thats hilarious! Got my laugh on today…Thanks! :D

  • Dag A. Torp

    So none of you twats bothered to check the date then?

  • SecularHumanist199

    I have to assume this is an April Fools joke, but not a great one. Still, the logic in it is consistent with the thinking of evangelicals.

  • AmyKatt

    Kind of funny.

  • Josh

    Well done! Definitely had me going…

  • thedreadedgug

    Doh! I fell for it! Well done. :)

    • Pinkophile

      So did I. But don’t tell (shh)!

  • Guest

    What commandant is broken when you take too many of the free samples at Costco?

    • Thisisjosh

      gluttony?

  • michaellaurence

    What Commandment is broken when you take too many free samples at Costco?

    • Jami Shofner

      It’s not one of the Ten Commandments, but it is a couple of the Seven Deadly Sins: Gluttony and Greed.

      • michaellaurence

        New personal record. Leaves me just five to go!!!! Whoops, there goes Pride.

  • Hassan Hamza

    All articles are looked upon with suspicion today.

  • Woola

    This what a atheist sounds like everyday.

    • offwiththeirheads

      Grammar not good. Sentence to hard.

      Let me help you out:

      This IS what AN atheist sounds like everyday. You see how different? Oh, too many syllables in “different”. You see how not same?

  • http://www.twitter.com/alansimpson jediofpool

    People got their hopes up for this? They can keep him thanks.

  • brent

    But the banana is man made…….

  • Matt Ranson

    This is right up there with Sports Illustrated and Sid Finch

  • Wes Etheridge

    I rather gathered this was an April Fools article when I read the headline. However, I guess that we can all hope that some of these true believers will somehow use their brains for something other than a hat rack.

  • doguhnew

    Hopefully nothing serious will actually happen today.

  • Bode Gibbs

    He’s an April fool

  • Barbara Brkovich

    Very funny, I still wouldn’t want him on our side if it were true!

  • Harriet Husbands

    There is something wrong with this person.

  • offwiththeirheads

    I wish this were true so we could send him back.

  • Charles Knoll

    Yeah, I just KNEW this was an Onion article until I remembered what day it was.

  • Elsby

    April Fool everybody!!!

  • Joey GF

    Philippians 3:2-3, Titus 1:10, Galatians 5:2

    • j9clements

      Why so fixated on circumcision?

  • Marcela Brusa

    Happy April fool. (you did not fool me)

  • http://shitmytoiletsays.blogspot.com/ Crud O’Matic

    Deformed bananas will make Kirk Cameron say “Hey, this really ISN’T an intelligent design!” – but all those deformed children and animals… nope.

    BTW, I know it’s an April fools prank.

  • Sparksis

    Shame… was really hoping he was becoming enlightened. However if a banana has the strength to change your convictions they wouldn’t have been very strong anyway.

  • Lee M Anderson

    Mr. Cameron – Go. To. College!

  • Frank Landis

    Just another self righteous phony. Not interested in his opinions.

  • rob

    Wow! You gotta have a LOT OF hate of God and Christians to jack this dumb-arse, childish drivel for humor. LOL…Pathetic.

    • Deanjay1961

      Yeah, it being April 1st couldn’t possibly be sufficient reason to make fun of Cameron in a lame attempt to mimic The Onion, hate is the only possible explanation….

      • rob

        Well….it IS darn fine Onion style!!!

  • Emma Duncan

    I’m thinking he ran out the front door because he saw a hot dude in the parking lot! now we just need to sit and wait to see what they come up with to excuse the banana, or to really prove that the banana really is “the atheists worst nightmare!” because you know its coming!